Finding Fulfillment In Real Life After Social Media Cleanse

At one point a few months ago, I started feeling as thought the internet was in control of me as opposed to me choosing when (and how long) I spent time online. In addition, I realized that I wouldn't feel uplifted or energized in any way after spending time scrolling.

I was going down UFO rabbit holes on Reddit, watching meaningless Facebook reels dozens at a time and doom-scrolling news websites endlessly. My brain was foggy, I was under a constant cloud of stress and, most importantly I felt like I was losing touch with actual, real life.

Worst of all, I was prioritizing screen time over things like my personal health, time with my family and more. I needed to make a change.

Mind you, I didn't realize any of this at the time. The clarity came after I decided to take just three days away from (most of) the internet. My three day 'cleanse' has reached the two month mark today (August 7th) and I don't think I'll ever look back.

FOMO! WHAT I AM MISSING!? 

I have (thus far) avoided ALL social media sites and all news sites.  I still keep up with sports using the leagues' specific apps and I post things on our websites for work but, outside of that, unless I am searching for something specific like Sartell's National Night Out info, I am not just aimlessly on the internet.

So, what have I missed? Absolutely nothing except things that are either out of my control (like the WW3 my wife told me I missed) or things that don't need to affect my life or energy, like stories of murders in other states or fretting over national politics.

As far as social media, I have yet to hear about an event I was invited to but missed because I wasn't online. I haven't felt guilty about not saying 'happy birthday' on Facebook to someone I haven't talked to since 1997. I haven't missed seeing that perfect family you met once at an event five years ago's latest vacation photos. None of it.

The fretting over Trump, over the Minneapolis mayor, Joe Biden, blah blah blah. All background noise.

The news has been an even better omission from my life. While I still keep up with LOCAL news that impacts my life, I no longer burden myself with things nationally and worldwide that are out of my control. I keep my news browsing to sites like WJON that are focused mainly on my community.

WHO IS MISSING (BIG OLD IMPORTANT) ME? 

As it turns out, absolutely no one! I have received exactly zero messages to check on me concerning my absence from social media. I have had no one reach out to request pictures of -my- family's latest vacation or social outing.

As it turns out, I am not nearly as important as the social media companies would like me to think I am.  In fact, I am very plain and boring and I like that about me.

One interesting thing? Facebook IS missing me and has been bombarding my Gmail inbox with meaningless updates on, again, people that are simply not important to my personal life. They aren't serving updates on my close friends or family, it always seems to be some rando that I really don't mind missing.

This has also opened my eyes to just how much of your social media activity must be tracked. I guess I always understood they would know if you hadn't posted lately, it's wild that they know I haven't simply visited their site in a browser lately.

WHAT ABOUT THE NEWS? 

Aliens in New Jersey! Tariffs! War overseas! A new documentary about a serial killer from 1976!

Each and every one of those things that at one point would have consumed my thoughts for days on end still happened in the world, only... they weren't my problem to worry about or solve. Again, I still keep up with local news and happenings that could affect me and that I could have control over but I am bowing out of knowing everything that is happening in the world at all times.

Plus, I found a large percentage of the news I was consuming to be hopeless and deflating- rarely are good news stories printed or followed-up on nationally.

WHAT DO I DO WITH MY HANDS? 

So, how have I been spending my time? Well for one thing I have started actually getting outside more (gasp) and... dare I admit... exercising! I have been noticing the beauty of the world, feeling the warmth of the sun and practicing gratitude for the things I have in my life instead of needing to keep up with the folks on social media.

I have been reading books and digging into The Bible. I have been doing crossword puzzles and Wordles. While I have always spent a lot of time with my wife and kids, I find myself spending more meaningful time with them without distractions.

I finally got around to fixing my bike tires to take the kids on bike rides, something I had been putting off. I went on YouTube (is that cheating) and learned how to change my own spark plugs (yes, I avoided all the "related videos" that are "related" in the way you and your fourth cousin's stepchild are related).

BUT HOW DOES IT FEEL? 

I'll be 100% honest with you: It feels like I am living on a different planet from other people. Sometimes that is a good thing, like when you miss out on a dire economic prediction that maybe never came true and wasn't worth worrying about. It can also be bad, as there are certain things that I am simply out of the loop from when in the past I would have taken pride in being 'informed.'

The best part, again, is not comparing yourself to everyone on social media. How could your kids' birthday party possibly compete with Beyonce's? Why are you putting those thoughts into your mind? And why are we so addicted to feeling bad online?

ARE YOU QUITTING FOREVER? 

Who knows! Maybe one day something will get me back on the ol' internet again. A temporary lapse may push me back into addiction. Maybe I will take enough time away from social media and the internet to begin to see it in a healthier way, then try to go back on there.

Or, maybe I will just look up at the beautiful blue sky, walk in the green grass, smile at a stranger on the sidewalk and say 'this is enough.'